Pages Turned, Bridges Burned, Lessons Learned

"And every tear that had to fall from my eyes,
Everyday I wondered how I'd get through the night,
Every change, life has thrown me,
I'm thankful, for every break in my heart,
I'm grateful, for every scar,
Some pages turned,
Some bridges burned,
But there were lessons learned."
~Carrie Underwood

I love music! While melody and songwriters do influence my taste at times, a good lyric can completely draw me in. Music speaks to me. I find it can pull the deepest thoughts and desires out of me and actually put them into the words that I don't know how to form myself. It is understanding, relational, and reminds me that others out there go through/feel the same things I do. There will probably be many blog entries that begin with a song.

Those who are close to me know that the past several months have been very difficult for me. I always knew that having two children would be a challenge, however, I was not prepared for what I discovered about myself in the process. I found that the "me" that existed was gone....stripped of everything I ever knew before beginning this journey of motherhood. My responsibilities changed, obligations were different, and priorities took on a whole new outlook. What I've learned is that we are constantly being molded, changed, made new, prepped for the next stage of our adventure in this life. Each time I am at a complete loss, the Lord instills more of his character within me, and with that, my faith reaches levels it never has before. As quoted from one of my favorite movies, "A bird may love a fish my Lord, but where would they live?" "Then I shall just have to make you wings." When my life seems completely out of sort that is just what the Lord does for me.....makes me wings....equips me with what I need to know him more and love him better. So, I am thankful...for every break in my heart, for every scar, for every lesson. And while my life may look entirely different than it once did before children.....different, is not always a bad thing to strive for!

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