Over the past few months, I have prayed many prayers.....for "time" with God, for solitude, for perspective on what really matters in life, for finding who God made me to really be, for daily strength, for help, for ways to reach out to others, for friendships, for my faith to grow. In so many ways I keep turning my eyes to God and waiting for Him to "zap" me with all of these things. Wouldn't it be nice if it was just that simple? But what I am realizing is that God has and is still answering my prayers....by giving me an opportunity. With MUCH hesitation and MUCH resistance, God has provided the fuel, the funds, and the fellowship to take me to Haiti. I leave in a few short days for an adventure I have never dared to take. My heart is as excited as it is nervous.
Excited for the risk.....having to rely on complete faith that everything will go smoothy.Excited about spending a week totally and completely free of the trivial things of this world.Excited about getting to just love on other people.Excited about getting to spend time with God, and getting the opportunity to see the world as He sees it daily.Excited about growing relationships among friends.Excited about getting to know the high school girls....to be a listening ear, an encourager, and a friend.Excited about where God will take me. I am not going on this trip to change the world. I am going on this trip to change mine.
Nervous about flying....I don't like to fly.Nervous about getting sick.....it tends to always find me.Nervous about my kids back home....that they are healthy and safe and don't cause themselves any bodily harm while I'm gone.Nervous about the lack of communication during the week.
The great thing about opportunities is that they are endless. When we pass on one, another will soon follow. But the question is.....what are we missing with every chance untaken? So as I walk blindly into the next week, I go ready and willing to be taught, grown, even changed. I am so thankful for this given "opportunity," but also for having the courage to seize it!