Saturday, August 14, 2010

"Let Go, Let God"

I have always been a dreamer. Most people say that they cannot remember their dreams, however, I have always been able to. Sometimes I wake from such a deep sleep (usually by a child crying =) ) that I have to sit for a minute to remind myself what is reality. The other morning, however, I awoke with a very clear image in mind. What was so interesting about the dream is that it wasn't a story, adventure, conversation, or anything that usually comes to life in the dream world. It felt more like a message....or maybe I should say "reminder." This picture in my mind was one that I remember so clearly from years ago. In fact, I remember discussing the meaning this image holds with friends in bible studies throughout college: a simple hand, gripping sand.

I like to be control of my world. Have I ever written about being terrified of flying? Well, I'm terrified of flying, and this past summer, I finally figured out why. I have no control of that plane. My job is literally to get in, sit, and let the pilot do his thing. I am putting my life in the hands of someone else. So that fear does not come from being confined in a small place, surrounded by strangers, tens of thousands of feet above the ground.....it comes from the fact that I have to let go and trust someone else with my life. MY LIFE!

So I begin to think about that sand. The things that make up our lives are as countless as the grains of sand we hold within our hands. We cling desperately to what matters to us, innocently believing that if we hold on tight enough, we'll never lose it. Yet we all know that you can't grip sand in your hand without it beginning to slip right through your fingers. When we hold it with open hands, however, palms up, as if we are "giving it away", it stays right where it should.

I think it is a sweet reflection of what God means when He asks us to have faith. He literally asks us to "give" him our lives, our joys, our sorrows, what matters most. This is something I struggle with greatly. I am usually the one holding onto that sand until God finally has to open my hand...and pick it all back up for me. If I would just trust Him to begin with, everything would stay right where it is supposed to be.

Somewhere along my journey I had forgotten about this tangible example of faith and trust. I awoke very in "aw" and very thankful that God never lets us forget His truth. And I am very thankful, that He never forgets me!

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